got to see the ba-by!

I went to visit one of my girlfriends last night to be introduced to her 3 week old baby boy.

Earlier in the day she sent me a text requesting I come as early as I can. Totally doable. That afternoon I ran down stairs of our office to purchase a gift for her - 10 minutes and $85 plus later I was dashing back to my desk. At 530 I packed up, logged off and on my way to pick up my car before going to her place as early as I can facing peak hour traffic over the big bad bridge.

The little boy was day asleep and this have us a great chance to chat. I received 42 minutes worth of feeding stories, in excess of 25 minutes about her almost being sent home as she was only 1cm dealated - the baby was pushing to the side. Then there were stories about the midwife and comparisons with her other friends, the friends that are also married and have children.

It was painful.

There was a little squirm from the crib on the little boy was stirring, she said he does that for a while it was my chance to give her the gift. She had a look at everything, the little clothes, the entire Johnson & Johnson range, she put it down with what felt like dissatisfaction and said dismissivly thanks for that.

After 2 hours or more of her talking about new mother hood, which I get, just not so much graphic information!!! She finally asked how I am. This was my opening to tell her and her husband that I had booked my flights to Europe! This was her opening to tell me where to go.


It had got to 830 Her husband had been cooking, her poured himself a glass of wine without an offer, then progressed to place two place mats on the dining table. No question to me if I'd eaten. How could I? I came straight from work... I took this as my cue to leave, saying I should go, I have to cook myself dinner.

I found it uncomfortable and not in line with my behaviour or how I was brought up. Not even a nibbly being offered. I wouldn't do that. And, I came baring gifts! I felt rather put out by the whole event. Won't be rushing back to visit, anyway we all knw married friends with babies all gang together, if our friendship didn't have enough strain, it certainly does now.

It's Complicated

It had been a secret, it was a very well kept secret. It was to prevent me from knowing the truth... To protect my heart and my memories of love. What I regarded as real love.

My ex-boyfriend D and I broke up 2.5 years into our relationship, during that 'break' I knew he started seeing someone. I thought it was some random skanky slut. It made me feel better in saying that.

During 3 months of our break he spoke to each other regularly and I sincerely missed him, he said the same. I felt empty and lost without him.

Our split was temporary, maximum of 4 months and the moment we back together we started talking marriage and before long we were looking at purchasing a property together, a place that would be our home.

Our relationship carried on for over a year with his insistent questioning of my fidelity, it finally feel apart when his accusations of me seeing someone brought me to tears, brought him to raising his hand to me, forced me to seek assistance from the police and finally I ended it...

Only a few weeks ago (I have started writing this post over and over) I found out the girl he was seeing was someone I had met many times while we were dating, she is the sister of E, his best friends girlfriend.

Since mine and E's relationship with respective boyfriends dissolved our friendship grew, we had both been through destructive relationships and came out weaker than anyone could imagine and slowly triumphed at the realisation that our actions were necessary and most importantly the best for our wellbeing.

Over a few glasses of wine a few weeks ago L and I finally spoke about it.

They were seeing each other for 6 - 7 months.

She met his family early on (I was kept a secret for almost a year).

She thought it was over between me and D.

I apologised for all the horrible things I said about her. Of course I didn't know it was her.

I was destroyed again. Felt totally deflated. The man I was planning to marry, the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with cheated on me for months, he accused me of the action he himself was doing.

He punished me for his own actions.

I didn't think it ever possible. I now hate this man.

The Olympics

I'm curious about the footage... We have only 1.5 TV stations broadcasting and the mainstream channel has only been showing events where Aussies are competing - Is it similar in the other nations, no representative participating, therefore no coverage?

Observations...

I wandered to the bus stop closest my house, 4 buses full of people went by. The crowd gathered, when a bus pulled into the curb the bunch of people crowded the doors and we all went on one by one.

The bus traveled over the Northbridge bridge and I look at in awe as I do everyday...

I was seated at the window of the bus, staring into space when the bus pulled into the next stop where people were in single files, lined to board the bus. They all stepped on in order.

The trip surprisingly takes less time going into the CBD than to North Sydney.

People dress so much nicer in the city than North Sydney.

I spotted a ra-ra skirt in the shops.

In my course of 9 student and one teacher I can confirm 7 students are married and the teacher, the other guy in the room is not confirmed.

The course finished a little early so I went in search of shoes in Chinatown, there was one point I looked around and I was the sole anglo saxon.

I'm drawn to venues that look lush and inviting, not trendy and large.

Customer service representatives can surprise me with their friendliness and professionalism.

Going to the bus stop at 9.30pm it not a bad nor scary thing to do.

Intending to get home from a potential boozy night to watch an opening of a global event is somewhat fulfilling. Even if I fall asleep a few minutes into it.

When falling into bed with 1000 thread sheets I consider myself lucky.