Stressed and Burnt Out

It's been such a long time since I've had 'pressure' on the job. I forgot what it feel like, I've come to the conclusion over the last couple of weeks that I became complacent in my previous role. Don't get me wrong, I work and I work hard. There is an abundant difference that I just realised. I thrive on deadlines, I'm excitable when it comes to closing a deal, I love back to back meetings, I enjoy being the one that people come to for advise.

I'm back baby. The salesperson that I denied for a few years revealed itself from down where it was long forgotten.

But... I thought I was back.

I walked out of a meeting, into the fire stairs which may as well be my office and lent up against the wall took a deep breath and faught back the tears. My 3rd week on the job and I was threatened with legal action. Too often it's my job to fix someone else's mistake. 4 months of unresolved issues and it's up to me.

It took one email 'thanks for all your assistance today' to turn my afternoon into a blur of emails, phone calls and running up and down stairs. I still have a lot on my plate but now I have an overwhelming sense of accomplishment.

You Are 66% Burned Out

You are very burned out. You need a huge break from your responsibilities, starting as soon as possible. And you need this time to reevaluate what you really want out of your life. Because you're working hard and going no where... and that would burn anyone out!

Are You Burned Out?

Your Worry Factor is 27%

You worry a little, but you usually don't go overboard. You know it's good to recognize your fears, as long as you let go of them. So whenever you start to worry too much, just take a deep breath and relax. You're not the worrying kind - and there's no reason to start.

Do You Worry Too Much?

Tomorrow is another day and I endeavor triumph. I will not recoil. I will be stronger .

Deal Breakers: The Male Version

I must thank all for not being too judgemental when it comes to my fickleness and quirkiness in men.

Cibby followed stride and constructed his version of deal breakers when it comes to courting a lady… love it!

Deal Breakers Part Deux

Thank you for the email *you* know who you are… Taking into account my recent dates and the irrational reasons for loosing interest before ordering dessert on the first date I’ve decided to add to my list of deal breakers.

+ A man that chews gum like a cow, I don’t chew gum myself and don’t understand the purpose let alone when you see the mouth moving in circular motion, clicking and popping away. It just kills me.

+ Any man with lots of earwax, blegh!

+ A man that lies to me once, even the smallest lie eg. He’s at a friends house when I call him and he tells me he’s at work. I’ll never trust him and ask millions of questions about his whereabouts every day.

+ He must be able to drink more alcohol than me. No ‘2 beers and I’m drunk’ guy for me.

+ He must understand that Silence Of The Lambs is one of my all time favourite movies. I sometimes aherm, okay often use quote's from this movie. This. Does. Not. Make. Me. A. Psycho.

+ I rate my friendships high, strenuously high. If a guy doesn’t like them and they don’t like the guy, an ultimatum presented. I’ll never pick the guy!

+ If James Blunts ‘Your Beautiful’ song is one of his top fav songs there’s no future for us.

+ He must understand that some days, as rare as they may be, I don’t want to leave the house, I’d just like to sit in front of the TV all day watching meaningless good, bad TV.

+ I hate text messages, as many people would know that by now. Even more when it’s written like 14 year olds. "Like, Ya noe wot I mean? L8r"

+ Men that wear these .

+ I will never drag my man to a chick flick, that’s why I have friends and my mum. In turn, I never want to see a horror movie, anything starring Rowan Atkinson, Mike Myers, Pauly Shore or Science Fiction movies. That, is why he has friends.

+ A guy that says any of the following:
Anythink
Somethink
Fouwa
Sweet as
Youse

+ I’m not comfortable with public displays of affection, a little kiss on the street is okay, but serious groping is not on. I’m not 18 anymore after all.

+ Baby talk – utter no no.

+ I hate people that stand on the right hand side of an escalator. My man has to be aware of these social rules.

+ I dislike unreliable people. You let me down once; I’ll let you down gently. Forever.

+ He must not quote anything out of Team America.

Consistent with my last list all the same attributes are desired: Compassionate, witty, charming, gentleman, respectful, loving, intelligent yadda yadda yadda….

A Wake Up At 1:00am

I received a text message from the guy I had the date with on Monday night, 1:00am! The only other contact I’ve had with him this week was a next day ‘had a good night last night’ message, next contact at 1:00am! ‘hey, I noe its l8 but I jus wanna say hello’. Seriously, who are these people and why do I meet them?

Only fools love with tears…

Again... With the ex...We saw each other yesterday morning, then again last night… A mind blowing kiss… It’s so wrong… But it felt so good… My heart and mind playing tricks again… I cried myself to sleep... I still love him…

Mates Feedback

I spoke to my mate today, he wanted gossip about my date. Haha... My opportunity to find out a little more too… He said: I’m a nice girl, he had a really good night, I’m not as stuck up as he thought I would be and he would like to see me again if I’m interested but he thinks I’m out of his league.

Well, if he doesn’t have self-confidence fuck it!

Quoting

If less is more, then think how much more more would be!

What next...?

Hip Hop Yoga. Phat Farmer Russell Simmons is not only a multi-million dollar flossing mogul, he’s been a devout yogi for more than a decade. In an attempt to introduce the practice to his disciples, he’s released Yoga Live, a fitness DVD with a hip hop soundtrack. Now you can downward dog to DMX and corpse pose to Dead Prez.

Week 9

Job Status: Overwhelmed!
Gym workouts: 5 out of 7 days, lots and lots of steps (15 floors, up and down 3- 4 a time each day)
Movies watched: Rocky II and Rocky III
Reading: Product Manuals
Diet: 2 Custard tarts, 2 cokes. 2 bowls of creamy pasta
Alcohol consumption: ONE GLASS OF RED WINE ALL WEEK!
Money Spent: nothing out of budget

Polite Applaud

Last night I went to see Matthew Bourne's Swan Lake, my usual ballet threshold is 10-15 minutes, this production being of with new dynamic contemporary flare I was eager to see it.

The colours were rich and vivacious, costumes flawless, the sets beautifully appointed and the head swan was damn hot, but, I was bored within minutes of this production the only thing keeping me through intermission, unlike the 3 surrounding groups was the magnificent sounds of Tchaikovsky. In future I’ll stick to what I know and love, opera.

A-Z

A few letters here were testing (I needed to google X and Z) thankfully the search was overwhelmingly happy, my X song is best played uber loud in the car with a subwoofer in the back, oh the memories of driving around Woollahra in the Skyline R32 with the base loud enough to set off neighbouring alarms…

My music taste is eclectic to say the least, genre’s cover from blues to rap, theatrical to daggy 80’s, hints of country to swing, the king of pop to dance. Dichotomy at its best, me to a tea!

A – Anyone Who Has A Heart – Dusty Springfield
B – Because of You – Kelly Clarkson
C – California Love – Tupac
D – Ding Dong Daddy – Cherry Popping Daddy’s
E – Eye of the Tiger – Survivor
F – Funkier Than A Mosquita's Tweeter – Nikka Costa
G – Get On Up - Jodeci
H – Hooked on a Feeling – Blue Swede
I – If You Think You’re Lonely Now – Jodeci
J – Just Want You To Know – Backstreet Boys
K – King of the Road – Roger Miller
L – Lately – Stevie Wonder
M – Mack the Knife – Bobby Darin
N – No Diggity – Blackstreet
O – One Moment in Time – Whitney Houston
P – Papa’s Got A Brand New Bag – James Brown
Q – Que Sera Sera (Whatever will be will be) – Doris Day
R – Remember the Time – Michael Jackson
S – Somewhere – West Side Story
T – Try a Little Tenderness – Otis Redding
U – Unchained Melody – The Righteous Brothers
V – Virtual Insanity – Jamiroqui
W – Wishing on a Star – Teena Marie
X – X Gonna Give It To Ya - DMX
Y – (You’re the) Devil in Disguise – Elvis (The King) Priesly
Z – Zephyr Song – The Red Hot Chilli Peppers

I Love My Friends – Part 1,567, 008

My girlfriend is currently on her honeymoon, over night she sent the following message:

Seen many cows while we are driving throughout Israel. We think of you ;-) love you!

I burst out laughing and giggle to myself when I think about it. I love my friends!

The Café

I love my coffee, I need one of a morning, my routine over thew last week has been via public transport into the big smoke, go to the café under my building have a coffee while reading the Fin Review. I get there early because I enjoy my coffee in a mug not a paper cup and there’s nothing better than relaxing with the paper watching the tradies across the road and all the hot men in business suits walk by…

Last week I made numerous comments about coffee being $3.30(totally excessive). When it was made my order was called out and I had to collect it.

Last Friday I ordered my $3.30 coffee and the barista brought it to my table.

Monday I picked up a takeaway because no outdoor tables were available. $2.70, okay so its 50cents to ‘have in’.

Tuesday I had a letter to give to the manager so I introduced myself as the new building manager and ordered my coffee ‘just make it $3.00’ and he brought it over with a glass of water.

Wednesday, I was greeted with a big good morning and confirmed my strong skim flat white, asked take away or have in, my coffee was $2.50 brought over together with a glass of water.

Today he said ‘same’, charged $2.50 and brought over to me.

Giddy up. How much will it be tomorrow?

Maybe if I flutter my eye lashes a little more I’ll have the same deal as the last café I frequented under my office. The best deal ever, if there’s a broken cookie in the jar I could have it for free – only catch, I wasn’t allowed to break any. I wouldn’t do that anyway; never take advantage of someone’s generosity.

Foot In Mouth

I’ve been at my new job for a week. Yesterday my boss and I were having a little chin wag, getting to know you conversation and alike.

He was telling me about his daughter, she’s a little one, I don’t remember the age (I never regard kids ages with any importance unless family) she was at day care centre and walked into a chair, she has bruising on her forehead and around her eye. What do I say?

Ohhh… Babies first black eye!

I was on the receiving end of a queer stare. Then he laughed.

Music To My Ears

I’m hearing my name called approximately a dozen times a day in a broad French accent... I love it.

Random Quote From Mother #8

You should start socialising with more attractive people. When you associate with ugly friends people will get the same impression of you.

The Last Week of Summer 2007

Job Status: Feeling totally lost
Gym workouts: Sweaty goodness everyday except Tuesday, Thursday and Friday *blush*
Movies watched: West Side Story, Rocky (The Original), Chicago, The Good Shepherd
Reading: Why Men Marry Some Woman and Not Others - a page into it
Diet: Turkish Delight – about 6, over the week that’s okay
Alcohol consumption: bit a wine, bit more wine and a bit more wine…
Money Spent: nothing out of budget

How Was Your First Week At The New Job?

My first week consisted of working 2 whole days, oh what am I saying I finished early on Thursday. Why can’t every week be like this? 2 days of work, 5 days of relaxation. I think everyone would be happier. Lets start a petition!

How do people commute on public transport on a daily basis? Day 2 and I’ve already had enough, all these people wandering in the same direction that just appear to be meandering aimlessly. Am I the only person that walks with conviction and a sense of persons surrounding me?

My first day consisted mostly of sitting on the floor next to the window sorting through 9 boxes of documents, files and folders. It was an organised mess. That’s what I’m sticking to. My concentration isn’t at its full potential, I haven’t had to learn something new or focus on anything over the last 11 weeks or so.

It feels strange starting work where my only tool is my phone. We will be getting computers next week and the phone system is in but not set up, one outgoing line.

For my first day I read, and read, and read. The only way to familiarise myself with projects. Yes, I said projects, they do development *happy dance*. My new office is predominately commercial real estate, I have all my experience in residential. So exciting learning something new.

I’ve been introduced to many people as ‘Building Manger’ also new to me. A few as ‘Property Manager’, former management will know me as ‘Office Manager’. How I love the property game.

To finish off my first day (before 4pm) I met a girlfriend for an after work drink, being in the CBD now it’s just so easy. We had a drink at…
The Vault Hotel
Ryan’s Bar
Quay Bar

On the walk back to the train station I saw a guy I went to school with, the guy I had a crush on…

***

Today I felt like I’ve been thrown in the deep end and I’m trying my hardest to stay afloat.

One event has put my mind at ease; my ex-MD is looking at coming on board. The one I worked with in 2001, the one that approached me to be licensee of his business, the one that allowed me to be curator at his art exhibition, the one that held my hand went I had my operation, the one I go out and drink with to all hours.

My first meeting was at 9am, then back at the office going through files, a long chat with boss to go over requirements of the business and direction. What he wants to do, how I think it can be achieved.

By mid afternoon I have been handed over 2 commercial properties to sell, 4 to lease, attended to a leak from a concrete slab and developed a crush on the plumber looking at the leak, been distracted by the Jetstar monorail going past the window. The orange is too bright!

I’ve been given lots of homework, it’s 7pm on a Friday night and I’m still working. (took little break to write this, yesterday was written yesterday).

I’m back onto OTE, I haven’t been a commission working girl for a few years. Ha! My last commission job had a generous base anyway. After the last many weeks of unemployment my confidence has taken a bashing, my ego stomped on by recruitment consultants telling me that I “don’t have enough experience to be a PA”. My prime role in the next 3 months is Business Development, an area I’m not well versed in. I need to learn fast and brush up in my sales pitches.

It’s Not a Date If You Don’t Kiss

Wore: White dress, low-ish heels for comfort should we end up going for a walk somewhere, it’s a bad look for any woman to complain about shoes pinching.
Sexy Lingerie: check
Will he see it? 99% no
Makeup: Lots of foundation to cover the HUGE PIMPLE on my forehead! Light eye make up, it’s a Tuesday night after all.
Hair: I didn’t go to the hairdresser that I’m way overdue, I did however put a treatment through it, all glossy and shinny :- )
Legs waxed: check
Body scrub and moisturise: check

I walked into the bar did a quick scan of the room and didn’t see him, went direct to the bar and bought myself a drink, looked around for a comfortable place to sit, plonked myself down and took a sip of the wine, all set. I’m cool, comfortable, if he’s running late from work I gotta drink in hand all the important issues addressed.

Within a minute he walked through the other door, coming from the lounge area, he exchanged smiles, he gives me a kiss on the cheek and sits next to me. My stupid brain starts thinking about the Seinfield episode of Jerry and Shmwoopy sitting on the same side of a booth. We start with the mundane how was your day etc…

He wore: charcoal suit, pink shirt with a well matched tie, no French cuffs *weep*
Clean shaved: check
Nice cologne: check, the same one from Saturday night that made my 2 girlfriends and me weak at the knees***
Occupation: Accountant, weekend security
Physique: like a front row footy player
Smoker: yes
Two syllable name: check
Cute accent: yep!

Conversation flowed easily; he must be the most well mannered man I’ve ever met. It sounds odd, that’s the best way to describe him.

Lots of getting to know you conversation, absolutely nothing in common, doesn’t matter makes conversation that little more interesting. I'm intrigued. I can’t remember what left field eccentric comment I made after approximately 30 minutes or so of conversation, I know I did the expressive hand gesture and mild flick of the head, he looked at me – I thought I offended somehow, he kissed me.

Yes, the end of night possible goodnight kiss dance, no longer an issue. We decided to go for dinner at Chinatown, he had never tried Peeking Duck. I needed to fix that*. We stood to leave, he took my hand and said ‘you’re wearing lower shoes than Saturday night, you’re hand feels different in mine’ ah ok, want to make me feel uncomfortable, that’s the way to do it. Quick re-composure, we wandered to Chinatown hand in hand for dinner.

Dinner was lovely, the waiter made our first little peeking duck wrap, so good. I love that sauce, I then proceeded to make another, and he watched intently I handed it to him, he was surprised. Why? After dinner he wanted to have another drink, it was approaching 11pm, no I thought best to call it a night. Simple date drink and dinner, good conversation, conversation is always good when one party has such a cute accent.

Was it a good night? Yes
Did he pick up the bill? Yes
Did he walk me back to my car? Yes
Did he kiss me goodnight? Yes
Will you see him again? Probably not, no spark


* First date with Sabre Boy last year, I introduced him to escargot
**Title with compliments Vikki, exert of conversation last week
*** Question from B this morning ‘Wasn't he wearing the same hypnotic aftershave?’

Ouch!

I'm learning to do this:


I have 3 bruises on my left leg, one just above my knee, one behind my knee and one upper side of my calve. To give my leg a little more colour there's also a huge scratch mark from my toe nail (a nail that hardly exists) right at the crease of my knee. I'm in pain...

This kick is so much harder then it looks! It is not natural for both feet to be off the ground like that. I'm so frigging uncoordinated.

Date Tonight

I have a date with Mr Accent Help. We’re meeting in the city this evening, convenient for both. I prefer not to be picked up on the first date, never know what Psycho you may meet*, yeah, I got faith.

After reading Aspen and Indiana’s posts I feel like I’ll be analysing every move this guy makes, will he buy me a drink? Will he walk me to a cab afterwards? Will he kiss me goodnight?**

This dating thing really irks me; I just want to fall into the comfortable conversation. Those initial getting to know you questions are so scripted.

As time goes on my attitude is getting worse, A next day phone call and there's no 'chase', I haven’t even had a date with him and because he is showing interest I’m already loosing it. I used to only loose interest in a guy straight after I sleep with him***, now look at me.

*After TAB guy just turning up in the middle of the night on a couple of occasions I’m overly cautious.
** Chat with a girlfriend 'It's not a date unless you have a goodnight kiss'.
*** I seldom go back for seconds, loose interest straight afterwards.

Week 8 - 2007

Job Status: I start a new job on Thursday 1st March!
Gym workouts: Sweaty goodness everyday!
Movies watched: Irréversible (only 30mins or so, thanks for the lend Cibby, not for me), Legally Blonde, (much needed after previous movie), Music and Lyrics, Jarhead
Reading: The Joy Luck Club (actually, I've only read about 4 pages in the last week)
Diet: Cheese and cherry strudel, an almond friande, a chocolate éclair, a midnight big mac, a few cookies with coffee. Must take better care of diet this week.
Alcohol consumption: Everyday, need a couples days off. Did someone say cocktail?
Money Spent: $$$ on celebratory patent black leather shoes

You Said What? I Love you!

I’ve been a really bad friend this week. I don’t care. This week it’s all about me! Okay! Me! I can be selfish every now and then (my IRL friends are probably choking on their coffee right about now)

****************************************************************

The Fireman from Saturday night sent me an email today – I can’t remember giving him my email address? My real one at that, full name! I didn’t give him my mobile number…. Note to self, don't drink so much! Oh well, he has invited me to a ‘fireman’s cruise’ it sounds like a dream come true. Men in uniform *dreams*

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Leaving a girlfriends place last night I races a new Mitsubishi Evolution – I won off the mark, first race since I’ve had my car fixed. I was on such a high!

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I love left field conversations, of late:

- How do you produce miniature Chihuahua’s?
- There’s many video’s on YouTube for ‘cat spanking’
- That’s nowhere near as nasty as ‘Trough boy’! Damn, I now need to explain Trough Boy to complete strangers

****************************************************************

I had lunch with one of my unemployment buddies on Tuesday; we spent $60 on sandwiches, soft drink and coffee. The high life at its best!

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Do you know those petulant pericytes, sorry excuse of human beings that go to a movie and they bring outside food and stink the entire cinema? I hate them too! But last night I was SO hungry - I was that person.

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I’m supposed to be seeing one of my girlfriends today, we met at fencing, she’s absolutely lovely, gorgeous. We have nothing in common. (She's the one that fed me to the wolves a few months back.) I’m now struggling to come up with any conversation. I did want to expand my social circle this year; it’s hard work!

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When bananas were $13kg what were people using in Double Bay and Neutral Bay to say they were looking at some lovin’?

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Exhausted

After the fire last night, Finding out my possible melanoma requires removal, interview being postponed, receiving a call from my other contract job on Saturday’s and being told I’m no longer required. I knew it wouldn’t continue for too much longer 17 units to sell early January, only 6 last weekend, 1 still available. Over. Kinda works well for my Saturday lunch interview.

I felt like going back to bed this morning and sleep through everything. But no, I can’t let a little hump in the road get to me.. I got up threw on my gym gear and headed up – I drove to the gym, the whole 3 minute drive.

I did a class, there was no way I was going to discipline myself to do anything more. My punches didn’t have punch, my shuffle had no bounce, my kick looked more like a ballet move, I almost punched myself in the face.

I’m back home, showered, I want to go and do something but I have nothing to do today. The beach sounds appealing but too much effort to get there. Yep, 15 minutes walk down a hill is too hard for me today. I thought of calling a friend for lunch but I don’t feel right spending more money (lunch yesterday set me back $35, sandwich and sparkling water – that’s what happens when I go to Double Bay).

I could go to a movie, I have 4 free tickets but I don’t want to waste a beautiful day. I’m averaging one day a week feeling low and ego dented, unwanted and needing some validation. My ultra positive outlook for employment has been forgotten today.

It’s only 1pm, I’ve had a workout, updated blog, had lunch and I have the rest of the day to do anything I want to, it shouldn’t include going back to bed.

Interview – Postponed

I was to have my second interview today with Kiss on the Cheek employer. He called and postponed.

We will be meeting for lunch on Saturday at Bondi. I am to choose the destination and time.

Easy.

My huge issue: What do I wear? It’s a casual Saturday interview over lunch! I’m usually all dressed up in my best when going into the city; the beach is just too hard.

Help!

The Quay and The Queen

Oh such a night, a momentous occasion, two grand ships entered our beautiful harbour, accordingly a small group of us decided to fight the traffic and join the celebrations. I’m so happy I did – look at some of the images…

We met at ECQ nowhere near as many people as I thought would be at the bar, especially seeing the sea of people below us on the concourse all trying for the best vantage point…

A few cocktails were had – I love having friends with benefits, 25% off all drinks, made $18+ cocktails desirable.

The QE2 entered our sensational harbour at 7pm with an entourage of sail boats and ferries that looked like dinghies sailing next to it. The two great Queens greeted each other for the first meeting with a “whistle salute” using their 2,000 pound, 7-foot long signaling horns that can be heard over 10 miles away.


We drank and enjoyed just being part of this wonderful occasion, time was fast approaching for the fireworks to commence. Unfortunately our western aspect on eastern circular quay meant we missed the majority of the fireworks display, we caught glimpses of the fiery bright lights, heard the loud whistles and throughly enjoyed the cannons being shot.

When the crowd slowly dissipated, and our group was calling it an night, we decided to walk up to the Opera House around the Botanic Gardens to see the bright lights of the QM2. WOW! Is all I can say.

A couple more drinks at near by Lenin Bar, Vodka of course for me, with a selection of over 70 Vodkas to choose from I was like a kid in a candy store! Time was passing and my 2 friends not working at the moment either we partied on! A midnight cheeseburger was had – how good does maccas taste after lots of alcohol? We continues drinking at a near by pub until close…

Our city was not prepared, all I’m hearing on the news today is complaints about the traffic. It was unprecedented that 2 ships in our harbour would bring a similar amount of people into our city as New Years celebrations. It's a sign of out times that so many people made the trip into the city.

Photos with compliments K. who walked to work over the Big Bad Bridge an hour earlier to see the ship come into the harbour.

Ya Callin’ Me Yalla Bellied?

When does it ever end? I went to the Skin Cancer Specialist yesterday. I’ve been concerned about one of my moles on my tummy for a while now. Each GP tells me to ‘keep an eye on it’. Okay, I have, now tell me why and does it need to be removed or will I keep an eye on it until is spreads half way across my torso?

After many months of procrastination I made and kept the appointment.

As soon as I walk into the tiny ‘specialists’ office he asked if there was any cause of concern. I pulled up my top and indicated to the centimetre mark on my upper abdomen. ‘okay, that has to come out’ I freaked! He asked if there were anymore. I’ll damn my heritage for the rest of my days. I didn’t eve think about it before I said it ‘do you want me to take this off?’ pulling at my top. ‘I bet you say that to all the men’ when did doctors get so cheeky? Last time my oncologist touched my breast and said ‘nice boob’ ha, he was commenting on his own work.

The doctor said he’d cut out my mole straight away… I stood like a mere cat and gravitated toward the door. No, no, no.. I can’t do it now. Needles. Stitches. No, no, I have to be somewhere soon. He laughed at me! I can’t believe he laughed at me! He said it would only take 3 minutes. I picked up my bag, ‘I’ll come back soon, I’ll make another appointment, I’ll take some vaillum before I come’ stuttered my way through that. Okay, he finally got it. My irrational fear of needles… he told me to take some relaxants, have a couple of drinks before I come and bring someone with me. Only condition, if I have a drink I have to bring one for him too….

He walked out to the reception desk with me, told the receptionist to book me in, make sure she makes the reminder call so I don’t run away.

I’ve requested my surrogate boyfriend to come with me. He laughed at my cowardness. I don’t care! No one is cutting anything out of me that easily! I’m fully aware it will only take a few minutes, one slice this way *shudder * one slice that way * skin tingles* 2 stiches, then I faint.

My Rival:

Week 7 - 2007

Job Status: Still looking
Gym workouts: 6 hour of various glasses – I took Sunday off, mostly due to dancing til 4am
Movies watched: Notes on a Scandal, Click
Reading: The Joy Luck Club
Diet: Burrito, a piece of apricot pie
Alcohol consumption: Too much I’ve forgotten! Vodka, champers, cocktails, port…
Money Spent: $60 on 3 new tops for the gym

Lend Me A Tenor

Tuesday night I visited NIDA for the first time. The theatre / university is so close to home and there’s almost a performance nightly and yet never been. Note to self: research more plays and go more often.

Press play while reading – it’s a montage of the entire play in 4 minutes, to the wonderful (for me very familiar) music of Orff, us Aussies may know the music from ‘this is a big ad’ (wait for 25seconds – really worth it)



It was a fun little musical comedy featuring some of my most favourite operatic pieces. Originally produced by Andrew Lloyd Webber. Overview:

Chicago, 1934 - The Cleveland Grand Opera is celebrating its biggest night in history: world famous tenor Tito Merelli, known to his fans as 'Il Stupendo', is scheduled to sing the lead in Othello. Through a hysterical series of mishaps, Tito is given a double dose of tranquilisers and promptly drops dead… or so it seems. Believing that Tito has died, the company's assistant, a fairly gifted amateur named Max, is secretly drafted into the role of Othello, donning the blackface and heavy costume to try to fool the audience into thinking he is Tito.

Soon, however, the real Tito wakes up and chaos ensues. Now TWO Othellos are running around in costume and two adoring female fans are running after them in lingerie, each thinking she is with Il Stupendo. Add in a volatile Italian wife and a fan-crazed bellhop and you have an hilarious farce that will have you laughing all night!

I was looking at the costumes and thinking how much better the bellhop uniform looked on the real bellhop and thinking about the amount of time I was on the floor of my girlfriends apartment helping put together the jester costumes. They looked awesome!

It closes soon. So much fun!

Happy Valentines Day

You want commitment, take a look into these eyes, they burn with a fire, just for you now until the end of time. I would do anything I'd beg, I'd steal, I'd die to have you in these arms tonight. Baby I want you like the roses want the rain, you know I need you like a poet needs the pain. I would give anything. My blood my love my life.

If you were in these arms tonight, I'd hold you, I'd need you, I'd get down on my knees for you. And make everything all right if you were in these arms, I'd love you. I'd please you. I'd tell you that I'd never leave you and love you till the end of time, if you were in these arms tonight

I’ve already had an affair this morning. It lasted a lot longer than anticipated. It saw me yelling, throwing my hand up in passion then caressing the wooded surrounds. It was a long once familiar stretch that I hope I wont be revisiting for sometime… hehehehe

I don’t have a Valentines date tonight; I don’t have a great love that I’ll be spending a romantic day with. How do I feel about being alone on Valentines Day? Ha, That’s why I have a great circle of friends!

Last year I agreed to my first blind date ever and on Valentines Day! It was a great night, even though he was married, this year I'm not going for any of the same adventures.


As per usual I’m going to have lunch with my dad so we can laugh at all the people staring at us assuming we’re a couple – yep, we’re both as crazy as each other.

Later I’ll be going out with a few of my single girlfriends for a casual night of drinks dancing and hopefully one of us will get a kiss good night.

Flashes of Friday Night

He slowly puts his arm around me, looking for permission, he pulls me into him with conviction, he runs his fingers along my face, moves my hair and pulls me closer with such strength, kisses me, I throw my arms around him and pull him in closer.

He pulls away, I’m breathless for a moment, I want more, he cradles my head in his hands, whispers in my ear, kisses me again..

I feel his warm breath on my cheek; he descends slowly kissing down my neck then back to my lips, deep, lustful, passionate. I close my eyes, lost deep in the kiss.

I look along his sun kissed muscular body glistening, run my hand slowly down his torso, my fingers are stretched out to feel as much of him as possible. He holds my hand leads it to be welcomed with a kiss.

His weight on my body, his skin feels warm against mine. My nails run along his bare back, he lowers and places his forehead on mine... We slip. We’re both so sweaty, nose into eye, head butt and laughing.

My Love Profile for Valentine's Day 2007

Your Five Variable Love Profile

Propensity for Monogamy: Your propensity for monogamy is medium. In general, you prefer to have only one love interest. But it's hard for you to stay devoted for too long! There's too much eye candy to keep you from wandering. Experience Level: Your experience level is high. You've loved, lost, and loved again. You have had a wide range of love experiences. And when the real thing comes along, you know it! Dominance: Your dominance is medium. You tend to be the one with more power. You aren't a total control freak in relationships.. But of course you don't mind getting you way! Cynicism: Your cynicism is high. Sure you believe in love, but you know it doesn't come easily. You scoff at "love at first site" and "soulmates." You rather take the real thing, as unglamorous as it is. Independence: Your independence is high. You don't need to be in love, and sometimes you don't even want love. Having your own life is very important for you... Even more important than having a relationship.

The Five Variable Love Test

Score!

One of my girlfriends gave me her Burberry Trench coat. It was 'too long for her' she bought it in London last year and worn it once... I've wanted one for the longest time, the classic elegance, the durable fabric. I'll marry it with (whats in my wardrobe that fits?) Black pencil skirt, throw on my knee high stelitto boots, the coat flapping in the wind...

I'm not going to say it, yes I am. I can't wait for winter to be able to wear it. On second thought with this chilly 20deg weather, I'll hold out a bit more. Dry cleaning takes time doesn't it? I love my friends!

Stormy, Stormy Night

We had a hug storm over Sydney on Sunday night. Here is our magnificent city under lights.

Week 6 - 2007

Job Status: Still looking
Gym workouts: 8 hours or more of sweaty goodness
Movies watched: The Last King of Scotland, The Firm
Reading: The Joy Luck Club
Diet: one chocolate éclair, lots of salads, half a pizza.
Alcohol consumption: half a bottle of champers on Friday night, a couple glasses on Saturday night and a Bellini on Sunday night
Money Spent: $50 on a dress (reduced from $219) $50 top (reduced from $129)

I’m Swimming in the Rain…

What a glorious feeling, I’m happy again… I went to the beach yesterday, for the first time ever I was in the water when it started to rain, no hesitation, we stayed in laughing at clouds so dark up above. It was so beautiful. Swimming in the warm water, the cool rain falling from above, Let the stormy clouds chase everyone from the place… running to their belonging and race to their cars. Such a beautiful experience with a happy refrain… Just swimming and talking in the rain…

Is That The Going Rate For a Giraffe?

I don’t understand some girls. Attractive young woman dancing around a pool table, she seductively moves against a guy playing, ran her hand down his cue, he looked puzzled not excited. She then picked up a couple of balls and played with them on the table! Who are these girls that think they can get away with this behaviour?

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I ate jellyfish for the first time on Wednesday night!

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What is the difference between a Crocodile and an Alligator?

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I was out and about with a few girlfriends, dancing, drinking faux champers. A girl grabs *our* bottle and fills up *her* glass. I see this, told my friend to confront her, if I did it I would smash her pretty little face against the glass. The girls response was something along the lines of ‘what? It’s not that important, It’s just champagne’ we’re both astounded by her response; a simple ‘sorry, I thought it was my friends bottle’ would’ve diffused the situation. Once again, my girlfriend spoke to her after my eyes narrowed and said ‘I’ll grab her by hair and force her to the bar to buy us another bottle if it’s not that important’. She told me not to worry. Not my nature. I approached the manager, advised him of the situation. We got a free bottle of champers!

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I had a hot chocolate with an old friend last night. As soon as I saw him I said “hello! You need a hair cut”

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My mother is sending me nuts. She calls me twice during the day just to see what I’m doing – soon I’m going to let go and say ‘just watching TV’

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The girls and I were dancing the night away, cute boy had his arms flying around us, dancing close etc… He flexed his arm a little and man, his bicep would make Popeye blush hmmmmm… One of my girlfriends joined a little later, I tapped this guy on his shoulder, asked him to show her is muscle. He did and next thing you know his tongue his down her throat – maybe he overheard her say to me ‘I’m going home with him tonight’ after feeling his arms.

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Why do people cheer at the opera? If the performance is moving ‘Bravo!’ is appropriate.

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If I’m going to get booked for speeding, it’s not going to be going 15km’s over the limit in a school zone – I want it to be for travelling over 180km – then I’m ‘speeding’

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If I hear anyone talking about purchasing a ‘Guess handbag’ in the near future I’m going to strangle her!

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I caught a taxi and there was an engine problem. The cab pulled over and told me that’s as far as he can go. It’s 12.30am. Dark street. 15mins walk home. The charge was at $25.60. He said ‘give me $20’ nahahhh… I opened the door told him $10 is all I’m prepared to pay, we argued for a minute about the charge – he didn’t complete his part of the taxi/passenger contract. I jumped out and started a brisk walk up the dark road. He yelled out bitch – I ran home in high heels!

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How do you broach the subject of nasal delivery to a partner?

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Quoting

Abuse of words has been the great instrument of sophistry and chicanery, of party, faction, and division of society.

John Quincy Adams

Week 5 2007

Job Status: Still looking - one interview
Gym workouts: Not much… 1 hour pilates and 1 hour boxing
Movies watched: Clambake, Kinsey, Dream girls
Reading: Nothing. Flipping through 2 months of Harpers Bazaar and latest Look magazine
Diet: one cinnamon donut, kebab – I think I had food poisoning last week.
Alcohol consumption: 4 consecutive alcohol free days
Money Spent: Car repair $1,420

Purrrrrring…

I got my car back yesterday, she purrs like a kitten, this is the car I know and love, the sports exhaust, dump pipe off the turbo still gives her a throaty sound but she is modest unlike the Magtruck she was trying to imitate for so long. Driving my hot little car is almost better than sex, I was caressing the wood grain gear stick, rubbing the wooden steering wheel, music down soft to hear the motor – ohhh goose bumps..

The Coffee Shop

I have a little local coffee shop / deli only a few doors down from my place. Sometimes I love it, go there and get a nice strong coffee to start the day, usually when I’m super tired and need that coffee injection to hit the spot immediately other times I curse its very existence. I used to think smelling pastry in the morning coming through my window would be lovely. It’s not. Sickly. Don’t get me started on the early wake ups on garbage day; the bottle slamming will wake the most heavy of sleepers.

Anyway…

There I am with coffee, taking up a whole table, cuz I want to. There’s a painter filling his wagon with paint and other associated materials, he’s taking his time, why not, its Friday morning? I’d do the same. Another car pulls up behind, in the ‘no stopping’ section, just idealing. The painter goes back to the store and brings out another tin of paint.

*wave to paint shop owner *

The woman in the car jumps out and walks up to the painter with sheer determination and almost yells ‘when are you going. I have a baby in the car!’ I suppress a laughter and under my breathe say ‘yeah… and..?’ The painter looks at her, glances around at the coffee shop people, I smile, couple on nearby table smiles, painter smiles and says ‘I’m sorry’ pauses for a moment ‘you have a baby?' 'What is the world coming to where woman have babies’. The woman seriously angry yells out ‘pig!’ and storms back to her car.

What is with women that bear children, they expect everyone to adjust for them? Not me baby…

Signs

I don’t believe in signs, karma etc.. Every thing happens as an action or a reaction. Simple.

I saw Dom on Tuesday when I dropped off my car; he had sprained his ankle the night before.

I couldn’t help laugh. I tend to laugh at others misfortune.

He told me today his ankle is fractured and it’s a sign. When I broke up with him he was in the hospital bed with 4 bones in his foot shattered…

Sign? Coincidence?

Communication

Text:

Old trusty Dr D

So Mademoiselle N, let us have wild yummy sex today babe, great weather for it. When was the last time you were deliciously slammed? Be daring and say yes, we’ll have a fabulous time. Mwah Mwah Mwah Dr D x

I didn’t reply. Surprised?


Email:

From last workplace, one former colleague asking how things are going and if I’d like to catch up for a drink sometime.

We never saw each other socially while working together – however this is the guy that I first met a year prior to commencement in that role at speed dating. Freaking small world.


Text: Call: Text:

My old MD from finance place sent text asking if I’ve got a job yet…

Nup, he called, told me about a business proposal, giddy up, we are looking at a completed development site. 70 units to sell. I see commission!!! WooHooo!!!! Wish me luck!

Half hour late he asked sent text ‘who are you living with?’ I replied with mum. He said ‘cheaper rent! Boyfriend yet?’ I was taken back, strange, ‘nup, easier that way’ he wrote ‘true’, he only broke up with his fiancé over Christmas.

Going to be an interesting day tomorrow… Also picking up my car from Dom – I get a lift there too. YAY!

Week 4 - 2007

Job Status: Still looking
Gym workouts: Thai Chi, boxing x 2, weights x 3, dance class x 2
Movies watched: The Lake House, Happy feet, James Bond, Casino Royale
Reading: The Vulture Fund
Diet: one cheese strudel
Alcohol consumption: approx 4 bottles of faux champers
Money Spent:
Michelle and Terry’s wedding present $132
Races $120

I Couldn’t Take My Eyes Off *IT*

I had lunch with a girlfriend at the forum in Leichhardt, we are chit chatting away eating and drinking, laughing, giggling etc ;-)

The waiter was walking back and forth with his member fully erect! Nooo! We kept looking we couldn’t help it. I’m the first one to say how much I love a nice hard cock, but this was just disturbing!

Why is it we just couldn’t take our eyes off it? I’m saying, its because of our eye line.

Ladies of Leisure

On Tuesday I met with 2 of my girlfriends for brunch at Le Paris-Go Café in Bondi, we were just eating and drinking coffee for hours, then N came walking up the street (yes, there’s another N – I don’t like it). Ha! We’re all unemployed at the moment.

My girlfriend and I then went to Double Bay, Bondi Junction for some errands, so much effort these days. After such a hard day we sat back in a Darling Point apartment with one of the best views of Sydney. Oh how we really enjoy life…

Because well, that wasn’t enough, we watched a movie.

Why can’t every day be like this?

600 Posts

I don't have a great idea for my 600th post - sorry guys...

Being 600 posts old hehehe. I have met some awesome people through this blogging thing that i just didn't think I would. Hey, I thought I would only last a month at most, but here I am.

I noted today that over the last month I've had 10 other bloggers de-link me. Well, to you guys that no longer visit, thanks for being so supportive during my unemployment and so fickle, since I'm unemployed I don't have regular blogging time, therefore didn't visit....

My lovely blog buddies, thanks for your random emails and drop ins, great comments and continued writing to keep me entertained when I jump online.

Love you!

Week Three 2007

Job Status: Still looking
Gym workouts: Pilates, Thai Chi, boxing x 2, weights x 3, dance class x 2
Movies watched: Déjà vu, The Break up, Blood Diamond, Babel
Reading: The Vulture Fund
Diet: Mum’s birthday cake
Alcohol consumption: approx 2 bottles of faux champers
Money Spent:
Mum’s birthday present $273 for the opera, $89 perfume
Michelle’s kitchen tea present $36
Peters of Kensington Sale!!!!
Royal Doulton 18 piece glassware set - $200 reduced to $59
Mundial 10 piece knife set - $499 reduced to $161
Nigella Lawson huge coffee mugs - $132 reduced to $46
4 basic tops $45

Quote from Mother #7

I’m sitting on the lounge watching the 6.00 news when out of the blue she says:

“Have you ever considered getting a nose job?”

Mum's Birthday!

Please press play while reading



I took mum to see La Triviata on Saturday night for her birthday, I’m mildly obsessed with Verdi (if you haven’t worked that one out by now) this particular Opera had me before I even went to see it. After my trip to Venice and getting lost 3 times in attempt to find La Fenice thanks to a book I read about La Triviata being played there for the first time in 1856, all the nobels coming to see the performance I just had to see it for myself.

There was a slight technical difficulty on Saturday night, the curtain wouldn’t open, so after a 20-30 minute delay… It commenced in its beautiful colourful spectacular of costume and dramatic voices. La Triviata has one of the most recognisable scores, in my humble opinion..

In the middle of the 3rd act I was starting to get tired, I felt myself whiling Violetta to die already. However, the singer did a marvellous job. This one, only for the die hard opera fans – Turandot at opera in the domain this weekend would be the best bet, with a picnic blanket and a couple bottles of wine :-)

Random Observations and Musings

1. There are so many woman at the beach with tattoos

2. There are so many men at the beach with tattoos

3. I don’t have the dedication to work out like some of the other woman at the gym. I’m content not to *drip* with sweat

4. There are so many woman at the gym with tattoos

5. The bite mark on my butt has gone

6. Men walking around with singlets and (long) shorts give me hot flushes

7. Why is it whenever I’m at the beach someone always comes along and sits ‘too close’ with their screaming child

8. Why are there MORE cars on the road with frangipannis on the rear window?

Random Action From Mother #6

I wake up early each day during this unemployment period and yesterday I had this lovely piece of journalism to read - with complements. Mother dearest

Week Two 2007

Job Status: Still looking
Gym work outs: Pilates, yoga, boxing x 2, weights x 2, dance class x 2, walk from Bondi to Tamarama and back
Movies watched: Marie Antoinette, The Pursuit of Happiness, Office Space

Reading: It’s called a break up because it’s broken

Diet: Was going well until, one guylian chocolate on Wednesday night, chicken schnitzel on Thursday night followed by half a slice of Sticky Date Pudding, one Double Cheeseburger from maccas at midnight Friday night, much needed due to alchohol consumption
Money Spent: $145 on hens night

Life: Hens Night

I’m not too fond of Hens Nights… It’s an excuse for a group of girls to get all dressed up, drunk, sing in the streets, do ridiculous dares, talk to strangers, see men naked and end up dancing the night away drunk in some dingy club you secretly enjoy but never will admit to. Hehehehe sounds like I had a good time, hey

We initiated our dear hen with all the profane dress ups as possible, it always helps when one of the bridesmaids is a costume designer.

Dinner was at Balkan, the food was delicious, the dessert… Well…

A stripper isn’t usually my cup of tea, I do prefer female strippers to male, this guy went the Full Monty! In a restaurant, it wasn’t exactly a private area there was just a slight kink in the room. I wasn’t impressed with his package. Ha! I was the lucky recipient of a gift certificate:

‘this coupon entitles the bearer to a night of hard romping’

the girls around the table thought I was the best candidate for the little piece of paper (I’m still waiting).

I love observing the girls walking down the street, the hen doing her dares, vale flapping in the wind

We walked from Oxford Street down to karaoke where 30+ girls squashed into one of the rooms, I can’t sing I’m not going to pretend I’m able to do so, my voice sounds like a chipmunk, unfortunately none of the other girls seemed interested in singing either. We jumped up to get the party started, we sung East 17 – Everybody in the House of Love, we were even entertained us with ‘the stomp’ (I’m really showing my age) What has the world come to when I’m the most extroverted person in a group? Oh yea, the hen and I slut danced our way through The Pussycat Dolls – Don’t Cha

My feet were killing me, my shoes were not suitable to for an evening of walking and dancing…

The next day some of the girls decided to met for lunch at Café Bondi, lots of food, lots of eye candy, followed by a walk by the beach and window shopping* at the markets.

*what else would you call it?

Put Your Hands Up! Put Your Hands Up! I LOVE THIS CITY!

As I asked in my last post, “Does it get any better than this?” Thanks Indy! I’m TRYING to remain positive hehehe... I know it's the truth.

Friday I spent the day with H., only 4 days in Sydney 2 of which will be spent at the Blue Mountains, he went for a leisureable stroll from Bondi to Tamarama and back, had a cocktail at The Icebergs, giggled at some of the patrons, a dip in the Pacific, a perve at some boys and shopping at Bondi Junction…

Rush rush to get ready to attend the opening of SoBar, lots of free alcohol, chasing down some caterers for canapés and dancing for hours.

Strange night it was, the first time I think I’ve ever been to Cremorne Hotel sober and before midnight and no action!

The Hard Life…

This morning my dear friend H. called, I asked her the hardest question for the day. Do I go the gym or the beach? She said beach but my body was yearning to work out. I did both. 2 hour work out followed by just shy of 2 hours in the sun and salt water. I’m off to a movie soon, then meeting some great buddies for a cheap eat. Does it get any better?

Family

Such is life.

I spent the day with my aunt; it was one of the easiest, best days of the holiday. We met at Paddington Armes for a light lunch which ended up being a huge steak, we did a little shopping on Oxford St, (I only bought a second hand book due to budget restrictions) went to see Marie Antoinette (I felt it incomplete) then walked back up Oxford Street for a drink at The Light Brigade. Perfect day. Only issue I had, went I spoke to mum later that day I couldn’t tell her I was with my aunt .

So Sweet!

I’m defiantly still on some form of man high. I was happily walking through WBJ today, yep again wearing my basic summer dress, thongs, hair not done sunnies pulling the loose strands away from my no-make up face. When a man approaches asking me if he can ask me a question: “I saw you a little while ago, you were going up the escalators and I was going down*, I would like to get to know you, would you like to have coffee with me?” Ohhhh! I was so surprised! I thought he was going to try to sell me something. So sweet, I tuned him down, only because I just had a coffee with cute boy from Saturday morning.

* I missed the sexual connotation, no interest

Week One 2007

Job Status: Still looking
Gym work outs: Pilates, boxing x 2, weights, dance class, a couple hours of club dancing
Movies watched: Napoleon Dynamite, Eight Below, Mad Hot Ballroom
Reading: It’s called a break up because it’s broken
Money Spent: $50 on nephews present

Edging on an Eating Disorder

I picked up some photo’s recently I’m smiling and I can hardly recognise the girl looking back at me. I feel sick looking at chocolate, cakes, pies, and everything that’s so called bad for you! It’s an odd turn for the girl that always said she’ll eat anything and balance it all out with a little more exercise.

Interviews Week 2 (hopefully of few)

Does fire excite you?

I met with another damn recruitment consultant; this one was the worst of its kind. “Thanks for your resume, let’s go over it” I felt like hitting her over the head and say “why don’t you read it you fucking moron and then ask me questions” Instead I just go through step by step what is in black and white in front of her. After a few questions about ‘the direction I want my career to take’ she said “I work with administration, PA’s and reception roll, I don’t have anything for you” She then went to see if the lady that looks after property appointments was available. No, on holiday.

Wednesday I met with the BDM that called me out of the blue the week before. I couldn’t really call it an interview, it was more like “I worked with this person” “I know him” “Wow you know *insert name*?” After about 30 mins of chit chat, a brush of experience and expectations, he also said I would have to do a personality test. ‘Does fire excite you?’ only I would be asked that! He said I must meet the Regional Manager and State Manager. Oh cool… Two seconds later he pops back, they are on a conference call, he then asked if I wanted coffee and like to wait – I had to conduct an open house inspection for an hour (great hard work for a day) coincidently he knew the principle of the business too. The property world is so small.

I came back, met with the 3 of them, I felt like it was more like meeting for lunch (ohhhh I remember one interview that was over lunch, lunch at Kingsley’s. Drank too much and still got the job). Well, bottom line for this position: I meet with ‘the boss’ when he get back from overseas in a couple weeks. If we get along I have the job – not bad considering I didn’t even submit a resume hehehehehe

Something’s in the Air

I don’t know what it is today, I was at WBJ, either all the men have got better looking this year or I’m seriously on heat!

Random Quotes from NYE

Vikki – “Your tits look huge in that dress”
Mum – “That’s because everything is big”

At the party…

Rali – “That’s a nice dress”
Me – “I wore it to my 21st b’day party”
Rali – “is it stretchy?”
Me – “Yep, very”

New Years Resolutions

I can't help it laugh at this one. I picked up my resolutions from last year and thought I best evolve from them first.

A grand old fuck you to 2006!

Welcome 2007

+ I will look after me. Body. Mind. Heart.
+ I will loose the 6kg I put on in the last 3 months - Must loose the 10kg I've put on in the last 15 months
+ I will take better care of my diet
+ I will commit to a work out regime again
+ I will nurture my relationships with family and friends
+ I will become less obnoxious with my own opinions
+ I will leave the past year in the past
+ I will look outside the square for employment opportunities - who thought I would be doing this again?
+ I will continue to look for a property to purchase as soon as I find stable work - again
+ I will believe (really believe) being alone is not lonely
+ I will not take the first job offered to me unless I firmly believe it is worthy
+ I will not work 7 days a week for long time periods - done.
+ I will not go out with a man I don't feel I have sincere intentions
+ I will not feed my hunger for attention from the opposite sex
+ I will not have another 1 night stand Oops for 2006 + I will not sleep with someone I just met that night
+ I will not let myself become anymore bitter nor cynical - I don't think its possible to be anymore cynical than I already am
+ I will not allow other peoples frivolous opinions influence me

NEW

+ I will not do anything I'm not 100% comfortable doing

+ I will take a positive outlook on my life

+ I will take a risk this year

+ I will travel to a place I've been dreaming to go

+ I will take responsibility for my actions

+ I will not blame anyone else for my failings