I'm not being blinded by the silly season. I'm beginning to see the light...
When he returned from his 2 week working stint in the States he called me within 25minutes of arrival, I went straight over to his place, and I couldn’t wait to have 120kg of man wrapped around me… We got along well as per usual; a couple bottles of nice red wine and a great catch up until the early hours of morning.
I spent Christmas Eve with him, a great lunch at Bronte Beach, it wasn’t the same. It’s all superficial to me. The way he talks to the waitress would upset me (green eyed monster) but I don’t feel jealousy I feel slight embarrassment, this waitress sees us together and the man is flirting with her.
He got up before I finished my lunch, this I find inexcusably rude, further to have a cigarette, I hate smokers! As soon as I put down my knife and fork he wanted to leave. It was déjà vu every time I went out with Tiz for a meal he would say ‘what do you want to do now?’ when I would be happy to sit and chat with a coffee for hours.
‘What do you want to do now?’… I felt my blood boil, I felt rushed during lunch. I shrugged, we ended up going for a walk from Bronte to Bondi, I got burnt (damn you Eastern European skin) I just wanted to go home.
He leaves again tonight for a week, nothing.
Maybe I’m comparing actions because last Thursday I found out from my account (of all people) that my last boyfriend got engaged on Wednesday night. Not even 18 months after I tried to woo me back.
The New Year around the corner, this charade will be over. It failed and very few people knew it was happening – just the way I wanted it, yea… maybe I subconsciously wanted it to that’s why I didn’t say anything? Naaa that argument could go in circles.
I never saw rainbows in my wine
When he returned from his 2 week working stint in the States he called me within 25minutes of arrival, I went straight over to his place, and I couldn’t wait to have 120kg of man wrapped around me… We got along well as per usual; a couple bottles of nice red wine and a great catch up until the early hours of morning.
I spent Christmas Eve with him, a great lunch at Bronte Beach, it wasn’t the same. It’s all superficial to me. The way he talks to the waitress would upset me (green eyed monster) but I don’t feel jealousy I feel slight embarrassment, this waitress sees us together and the man is flirting with her.
He got up before I finished my lunch, this I find inexcusably rude, further to have a cigarette, I hate smokers! As soon as I put down my knife and fork he wanted to leave. It was déjà vu every time I went out with Tiz for a meal he would say ‘what do you want to do now?’ when I would be happy to sit and chat with a coffee for hours.
‘What do you want to do now?’… I felt my blood boil, I felt rushed during lunch. I shrugged, we ended up going for a walk from Bronte to Bondi, I got burnt (damn you Eastern European skin) I just wanted to go home.
He leaves again tonight for a week, nothing.
Maybe I’m comparing actions because last Thursday I found out from my account (of all people) that my last boyfriend got engaged on Wednesday night. Not even 18 months after I tried to woo me back.
The New Year around the corner, this charade will be over. It failed and very few people knew it was happening – just the way I wanted it, yea… maybe I subconsciously wanted it to that’s why I didn’t say anything? Naaa that argument could go in circles.
I never saw rainbows in my wine
10 comments:
Sometimes there is a honeymoon period knowing people where you see the good things and either not see bad habits, mannerisms etc that once that honeymoon period ends all those not so good things seem magnified!
120 Kilos!!!!!! WTF...He's a bloody giant...you must have been dwarfed..why didn't you walk in his shadow? You wouldn't have got sunburned LOL
PS: Tell him to piss off - he is a waste of time by the sound of it.
PPS: Hope the rest of your Xmas was good though :)
why was he being such a dick? Boy do you deserve a MILLION times better than that!
I feel a sense of sadness when I read that ...
Natalie :-) I am not the one to interfer in other people's life. However, I will say something as a friend :-)
It is not finding someone better.. Love is not a commodity. If it was , then we would just go and find the better deal right? It is not. However, Natalie.....if someone hurts you, he does not deserve you.
I know it will hurt. I know it hurts. I know the feeling. However, the best way to forget the feeling is to be with lots and lots of friends and just love yourself .:)
Remember! You the best! And everyone little less best :D
Happy new Year
Swagato
I hope these events give you some kind of closure, and you can let go...
xoxo
Cheers to better relationships in '07
Greg, i sure now that! I was aware there would be issues, i was hesitant, now i know why.
Scorpy, thats right 6'4" i like big boys. I'll go back to friend or go back to the whole BB thing with him. Chrissie was lovely thanks babe. Not as exciting as yours by the sounds of it
M - Maybe he always was and i needed a little more - no more
Swagato - its not that bad, i'm just traveliing with my eyes open for a change
CB - it does and thats what i neeeded :-)
allbilly - thanks
yep, that little voice inside your head knows you deserve to be treated better than that.
'good to see you're listening to it :)
Hmph. We don't like him at all. Fancy flirting with the waitress in front of you! Don't worry, though - there are nice boys out there. 2007 has to be better than 2006!
Buon Anno!!!
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